Reflection, the process of exploring and examining ourselves, our perspectives, our attributes, our experiences, our actions and interactions helps us gain insight and move forward. It’s a great practice to do regularly because it gives our brain an opportunity to pause amidst the chaos, untangle and sort through observations which inform our future.

The beginning of a new year is the perfect time to stop and reflect. I’ve been curating great reflection questions for years. This year I heard these and wanted to share them with you.

What did you do in 2022 that made your future self proud?

This questions takes us beyond immediate gratification. So much of how we operate is based on immediate gratification. We order online and get it the same day. We type in our coffee order and roll through the drive up. We post a picture and get immediate gratification. Simply doing what gratifies in the moment will not get us where we want to be in the future.

I have a two-decade history of chronic and excruciating headaches. Over the years, I’ve tried many things to find a solution. In 2022, I started Craniosacrial therapy with great success. My future self is going to be so proud of me for that. (If you want more information, I will introduce you to Dr. Jordan Adams.)

My concept, understanding, mindset on money has been shaped in a way that left me with a scarcity mentality — always assuming there is not enough; there will not be enough; I can not get there from here. In 2022, I purposely started looking at my malformed ideas and intentionally revamped them. It took daily work, weekly meetings, hours of reading, deliberate conversations. My future self is going to be so proud of me.

What did you do in 2022 that made your future self proud?

What was the best compliment you received this year? What did it signify to you?

I received a text from a friend and client. "You’ve had a significant impact on changing the trajectory of not only my life but the life of a lot of people in my family.” Wow! What a beautiful thing to say. What it signifies to me is I’m operating in my assignment, my calling, my design. And when I operate in my God-given design, it starts a ripple effect.

What was the best compliment you received this year? And more importantly, what did it signify to you?

How did your self-perception change this year?

I don’t have time to fully unpack my answer to this but let me simply say my culture taught me I’m only enough when I participate in a particular activity with fervor and dedication. It’s not just that I need to participate but with the right level of enthusiasm, commitment, and sacrifice, even if it’s not meaningful, or if I don’t fully align with the intent, or if it opposes my values in some way. I’m learning I’m enough even when I don’t fulfill this cultural expectation.

How did your self-perception change this year?

What did you learn from your challenges and disappointments?

Every challenge and disappointment gave me yet another opportunity to realize I have a choice. I have a choice to lose my mind, my health, my happiness. Or I can chose to respond in a completely different way — acknowledge what’s happened, accept that it did happen, and take whatever action is needed in the moment.

Recently, I heard someone say it this way. “We are the mountain. Emotions are the weather system. Be the mountain.” A weather system is necessary just like our emotions. As we acknowledge our emotions, we can navigate the moment without letting our reaction run away with us.

What did you learn from your challenges and disappointments in 2022?

What’s a thinking bias you’ve become aware of this year?

A few examples of thinking biases: “Things are always going to go wrong.” “Whatever you do, don’t upset her.” “I think he’s mad at me.”

Of course, when I heard this question my first reaction was, “Surely I don’t have any thinking biases!” Knowing that was not likely, I sat with it a little longer. And here’s the thinking bias I discovered, "If I don’t do anything it will get better. If I wait a little longer. . . If I keep thinking about it . . .” Truth is no action gets me no where. Now the challenge for me is to quit operating under this thinking bias.

What’s a thinking bias you’ve become aware of in 2022?

We live in a face-pace, production-demanding world. Seldom do we have people or moments directing us to pause and reflect. It’s important for us to remember life is a marathon. Pausing to reflect is not a luxury, it’s a necessity.